Ms Patches Grooms Mr Whiskers

So, these two appear to be getting along very well now. They still have their moments. I'll hear them brawling and have to separate them--time out, so to speak--but they always come back together. Mr Whiskers is like a football player, strong and solid. I can feel this when I pet him, the way he leans with force into my hand. He butts her with his head when she goes by, in a gentle but clear way.

Twice now, I've been sitting with them and Ms Patches started to groom him--so sweet she is. Patches is very dainty and I think his strong advances scare her. What is so touching is that she always comes back.

Here she's grooming once again. (Clearest photos I can get with my iphone.)

he leans in to accomodate

Then he rolls back to "embrace".

This is too much for Ms P, who vanishes.

I continue to observe because I am not sure whether to work to have them adopted together or separately. I do think cats enjoy company even if it is not the perfect match. For example, my mother's and my cat are not the best of friends, but I notice they look for each other. And when they rest I see all three Mia, my dog, Cuddles, and Scooter rest together--especially during a storm.

P.S. When Whiskers and Patches brawl upstairs, Mia hides under the kitchen table and Scooter and Cuddles cry to be let outside...quite the scene.

Ms Patches Loves to Play

Ms Patches is such a joyful cat. She learned to play from her kittens. She used to watch them from a safe place in the 244 West 10th apt. This was before she was comfortable with people. I thought once they left she would hide under the bed, but to my surprise she leapt out and started pushing the balls with the bells around, batting at string, chasing feathers.

Also, as the kittens were leaving, she went into heat. Although it was an unfortunate turn of events in one way, it allowed us an "in" with her, as she would let almost anyone pet her. I tried many different strategies to calm her. The idea was to wait until she went out of heat to spay her, some vets will disagree with this, but this is what I was told at first. But she never went out of heat. I waited longer than i perhaps should have and learned a lesson along the way, BUT it allowed me the opportunity to get closer to Patches, because the touches seemed to be somewhat soothing. I usually started out by letting the back of my hand slide along her body as she passed by.  Gradually I was able to stroke along her ears, her neck, did some small circles on her neck, and did circles with opposite hands, simultaneously (called the "turtle" in TTouch) on her thighs. This became a bonding time.

It was mostly an extremely stressful time, because I knew she was uncomfortable, but we came through this period all the wiser. I'm guessing by her behavior that Patches learned that humans can be "ok" and even preferable to be around (as opposed to not being around) and I learned that sometimes you have to spay a cat when it's in heat. You just have to go to someone who is very experienced.
And so now I have one very, very playful torty female. I think playing is a very good exercise for the cats. And it can be bonding.

She loves to play mole rat. This game was first taught to me by my ex-husband Curt. We first played this with Mia. She's not really into it any more, but Patches can't get enough of it. You move something under a blanket, like the stick, and she'll follow it. The only down side to this game is that your cat might want to play this game with your toes when you are trying to go to sleep. I strongly recommend not getting this game started on your bed, OR sleep with a thick blanket.

Patches also likes to chase things. She'll chase a ball or treats and sometimes she even catches them with her paws. I think her favorite is the feather on the stick. She'll play with this for hours.

She sometimes upsets Mr Whiskers with her zooming around, chasing imaginary objects, or tiny things she finds to push around, like paper clips, but she has a way spreading cheer with her antics.